God commands us to first love Him then to love everyone else as ourselves (Matthew 22:37-39). No where in His word does it say to only love those who love us, wish us well, or have our best interests in mind. On the contrary, quite the opposite is stated, He wants [us] to “bless those who curse [us] and pray for those who mistreat [us]” (Luke 6:28).

I know firsthand this is easier said than done but it’s not an impossible task. It is, however, a feat that will require complete submission of Pride and anger to the word and love of God. This is not a task that is easily achievable by mere human strength and determination because our first instinct is to return the same feelings toward those who have wronged us or ‘give them a taste of their own medicine.’ We naturally want our voices heard and want others to experience a bit of the frustration we experience. But just as Jesus prayed for the forgiveness of those who crucified Him on the cross, with true surrender of our hearts and desires to God, we also must pray that our hearts soften toward those who think the least of us.

I believe the way to approach such a delicate matter is to first acknowledge that we were wronged and to be honest with ourselves and God about how we truly feel toward the perpetrator. There is no point in faking how we truly feel because God, whom is all knowing, already knows our true emotions. The next step is to ask God for help in forgiving and praying for that person. We have to be intentional about yielding our desires and putting up a great fight with our human nature because naturally we would rather curse or ridicule the other person. We must: ask God how we may pray for this person; pray for his or her salvation in Jesus; pray for transformation in his or her life and heart; and pray that our ‘turning of the other cheek’ will depict the love of Christ through us; and that our actions or inaction will be the light that illuminates the darkness in his or her heart. Worst case scenario, if we pray for all of these things and the person remains mean, and continues to have ill will toward us, we must not allow his or her actions to deter us from doing what we know is right and what our heavenly father requires of us. Their action should not determine our reaction.

Loving and blessing those who dislike, misuse, persecute, or even hate us does not mean we should become doormats or stay in abusive situations. If we are caught in unsafe situations, by all means we should call the police and get to a safe place. We must always use Godly wisdom and discernment to avoid certain people, places, and situations. If maltreatment befalls us anyway, we are to trust that “the Lord will fight for [us] and [we] should hold [our] peace” (Exodus 14:14). “[We] should not avenge [ourselves]…because vengeance is [the Lord’s and He ] will repay” (Romans 12:19).

Sisters in Christ, I encourage you to stay the course and let the Lord defend you. I know it hurts when they talk about you and is unfair the way they treat and take advantage of you. I suffer with you, as I too have many stories to tell. However, let us surrender our hurt, pain, and our ‘enemies’ to the Lord. Let us not wish them evil for the evil they have imposed on us, but rather let us pray that the Lord will soften our hearts toward them and grant us peace. Let us stand on the word that whatever the enemy uses for evil against us, God will turn it around in due time for our good and the good of others for His glory (Genesis 50:20).

Nothing catches God by surprise. Before a wrong is done toward us, He already knows and often prepares us for it. I believe He allows us to go through turmoil, trials, tribulations, and chaos so that when we overcome them, we may help others by drawing from our own personal buckets of firsthand experiences. Going through hardships also create sympathy and empathy within us for others experiencing similar circumstances. Going back to the topic at hand (I veared off topic for a second there lol), choosing to love and forgive Someone for an offense, whether great or small is for our own benefit because where love resides, bitterness, resentment, hate, etcetera, cannot. Let it go and let God handle it!

Prayer

I thank you for your unconditional and forgiving love that covers me despite my wrongs. I pray you will strengthen me and help me to love and forgive others (those who love me as well as those who don’t) in the same manner. Help me to genuinely want the best for them whether I receive an apology or not. Lord, I acknowledge that this is a very difficult task and often I would rather react inappropriately than to surrender my anger to you. But Lord, I thank you for your overwhelming love that breeds patience within me and always uplifts me when I fall short. I surrender my all to you, have your way in me and through me, in Jesus’ name. Amen.

Relatable Bible Verses

Jesus said to him, “ ‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ And the second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets.” Matthew 22:37‭, ‬39‭-‬40 NKJV https://bible.com/bible/114/mat.22.37-40.NKJV

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. John 13:34 NKJV https://bible.com/bible/114/jhn.13.34.NKJV

The Lord will fight for you, and you shall hold your peace.” Exodus 14:14 NKJV https://bible.com/bible/114/exo.14.14.NKJV

bless those who curse you, and pray for those who spitefully use you. Luke 6:28 NKJV https://bible.com/bible/114/luk.6.28.NKJV

Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord. Romans 12:19 NKJV https://bible.com/bible/114/rom.12.19.NKJV

Then Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.” And they divided His garments and cast lots. Luke 23:34 NKJV https://bible.com/bible/114/luk.23.34.NKJV

But as for you, you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good, in order to bring it about as it is this day, to save many people alive. Genesis 50:20 NKJV https://bible.com/bible/114/gen.50.20.NKJV

Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails…